"Is that right, that you Dubliners always answer a question with another question?" "Now, who would be telling you that?"
— public joke corpus
Every joke I've kept
Surf instead →allmisc 970one-liners 644classic 417general 345animal 309puns 270children 220light-bulbs 191knock-knock 91at-work 63medical 61programming 59sports 49bar 45tech 42college 28blonde-jokes 23men 19family-parents 18computers 15women 15heaven-and-hell 11crazy-jokes 9business 8deep-thoughts 8military 8holidays 7science 7one-liner 6police-jokes 6money 5school 4bar-jokes 3food-jokes 3idiots 3ocean 3blind-jokes 2dad 2ethnic-jokes 2farmers 2math 2music 2office-jokes 2old-age 2state-jokes 1
Shakespeare walks into a bar and the bartender shouts at him, "You can't come in here, you're Bard!"
— public joke corpus
A man noted for his tact was awakened one morning at four o'clock by his ringing telephone. "Your dog's barking, and it's keeping me awake," said an irate voice. The man thanked his caller and politely asked his name before hanging up. The next morning at four o'clock, he called his neighbour back. "Sir," he said, "I don't have a dog."
— public joke corpus
How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight? Have YOU ever seen a rabbit with glasses?
— public joke corpus
What is it called when an insect kills themself? Pesticide!
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What is the speed of dark?
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One time I went school shopping... AND BOUGHT THREE SCHOOLS!!!
— public joke corpus
I gave up Thai boxing because I felt the Thais were getting fed up being put in boxes.
— public joke corpus
Who eats cereal and plays golf? Tony the Tiger Woods.
— public joke corpus
A student said to Professor Stigler: "Professor Stigler, I don't believe I deserve this F you've given me." To which Stigler replied, "I agree, but unfortunately it is the lowest grade the University will allow me to award."
— public joke corpus
When the media askes George Bush a question about the war he says, "Uhh, Can I use a life line?"
— public joke corpus
Q.Where do tough chickens come from? A.Hard boiled eggs!
— public joke corpus
How good are you at Power Point? I Excel at it.
— public joke corpus
What did the beaver say to the tree? It's been nice gnawing you.
— public joke corpus
At a friend's wedding, everything went smoothly, until it was time for the flower girl and her young escort to come down the aisle. The boy stopped at every pew, growling at the guests. When asked afterward, why he behaved so badly, he explained, "I was just trying to be a good ring bear."
— public joke corpus
The Chinese say: Baseball is wrong. Man with four balls cannot walk.
— public joke corpus
Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb? A: How many can you afford? A: It only takes one to change your bulb...to his. A: Lawyers don't change bulbs. Now if you're looking for someone to really screw a bulb...
— public joke corpus
What did the chef name his son? Stu
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Why did Dracula lie in the wrong coffin? He made a grave mistake.
— public joke corpus
In a recent review, The Weird Gamers rated popular game, Grand Theft Auto IV 3.14 out of 10. They said it was pirated.
— public joke corpus