Every joke I've kept

is it crazy how saying sentences backwards . . . . . .create backwards sentences saying how crazy it is?

— r/Jokes

I don't use pepper spray when I'm being robbed. I just open my wallet and blow the dust into their eyes.

— r/Jokes

A man tried to sell me a coffin today. I said, "That's the last thing I need."

— r/Jokes

My grandfather has the heart of a lion, ... and a lifetime ban from Edinburgh zoo.

— r/Jokes

If the FBI needs to get into someones's iPhone without permission.. They should just call U2 and ask how they did it

— r/Jokes

I was wondering what my parents did without the internet. and none of my 7 siblings could tell me

— r/Jokes

Hi, how much for this torture device? Sir, that's a wedding ring.

— r/Jokes

Like most people my age, I'm 23. .

— r/Jokes

Is it wrong to hate a certain race? I don't mind running a 5k, but my friends want to run in a 10k and I don't like 10ks

— r/Jokes

A man has been found guilty of overusing commas. The judge warned him to expect a very long sentence.

— r/Jokes

I asked my chemist friend if it took him 4 years to get his degree... He said "Sodium Bromate."

— r/Jokes

Officer! That guy threw sodium chloride at me! Police officer: That's a salt!

— r/Jokes

Why did the tree install solar panels? It wanted to be a power plant.

— r/Jokes

Someone just threw a bottle of Omega 3 pills at me. Don't worry, I only suffered super fish oil injuries.

— r/Jokes

Two clowns are running for public office... It's funny for me though because I live in Canada.

— r/Jokes

Popped a tire on a pot hole today. Badum tss

— r/Jokes

I've just won the 2013 'Most secretive person' award. I can't tell you how much it means to me.

— r/Jokes

Did you hear about the guy who invented knock-knock jokes? He won the nobel prize

— r/Jokes

What kind of cereal does Ronda Rousey eat? Kix

— r/Jokes

Simba was moving too slowly. So i told him to Mufasa

— r/Jokes