Every joke I've kept

Why do pirates not know the alphabet? They always get stuck at "C".

— public joke corpus

Knock-knock! Who's there? Toby. Toby who? Toby or not toby that is the question!

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A waiter on a ship said to a boarding lion "sir, do you want anything of the chef's special?" The lion said "nah..I'll look at the passenger list,though!"

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Ever since Rhianna got dumped by her boyfriend, she put all the stuff that was his or made her remember him she put : " to the left to the left... in the box on the left..."

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How can you tell the difference between a violin and a fiddle? Look at the audience!

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Do you know what style of shoes a frog loves most? Open toad!

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What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.

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Q: What's the difference between a black owl and a white owl? A: White owl: Who who Black owl: Who that who that

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What are the blonde's first words after 4 years of college? "Would you like fries with that?"

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Q: Why do people have small dogs? A: So they can carry them in their bags, and when the person farts, they can blame it on the dog.

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This is a joke song ok "I pledge allegiance to the flag, Micheal Jackson is a fag. He used to play with little toys, but now he plays with little boys."

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How do priests make Holy Water?They boil the hell out of it!

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The Americans and the Russians had a car race, in which the car from America won. However, the report in the newspapers of Russia, read as follows – "In a recent motor race, the Russian car finished in second place, while the American car finished next to last." (There were only two cars involved!)

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Golf is a Hard Game to Figure.

Golf is a hard game to figure. One day you'll go out and slice it and shank it, hit it onto all the traps and miss every green. The next day you go out, and for no reason at all, you really stink.

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Can you decipher this phrase? lookkool Look both ways!

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Q: What do you get when you cross a snake and a kangaroo? A: A jump rope

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This guy and a girl were in a golf cart and the guy drops his tees out of his pocket and the lady asks what is he doing? So, the guy says: I put my balls on them and I drive them.

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Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.

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Finally realized why my plant sits around doing nothing all day... He loves his pot.

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What's red and invisible? No tomato.

— public joke corpus