Why did the chicken cross the road? There weren't any cars coming!
— public joke corpus
Every joke I've kept
Surf instead →allmisc 970one-liners 644classic 417general 345animal 309puns 270children 220light-bulbs 191knock-knock 91at-work 63medical 61programming 59sports 49bar 45tech 42college 28blonde-jokes 23men 19family-parents 18computers 15women 15heaven-and-hell 11crazy-jokes 9business 8deep-thoughts 8military 8holidays 7science 7one-liner 6police-jokes 6money 5school 4bar-jokes 3food-jokes 3idiots 3ocean 3blind-jokes 2dad 2ethnic-jokes 2farmers 2math 2music 2office-jokes 2old-age 2state-jokes 1
Always go to other peoples funerals, or they wont come to yours.
— public joke corpus
According to research 80% of the poplation can't do simple maths.Good news for us brainboxes,the other 10%.
— public joke corpus
Men who walk in front of car get tired. Men who walk in back of car get exhausted.
— public joke corpus
I am sure most people have heard of or watched the popular show the Ozbournes and still more people have Heard Ozzy sing. My question is how can Ozzy sing if he can't talk???
— public joke corpus
Q: What do you have when 100 lawyers are buried up to their neck in sand?Not enough sand.
— public joke corpus
Don't Give Me Food... Give Me Water
Give me food and I will live. Give me water and I will die. What or who am I? (Scroll down) A fire
— public joke corpus
There's this guy he goes to see the doctor and says, "Doctor, Doctor, I have a terrible problem. I have a strawberry stuck up my bottom." The doctor says, "It's ok, I'll give you some cream to put on it."
— public joke corpus
How can you spot a happy motorcyclist? By the bugs in his teeth.
— public joke corpus
Q: How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb? A: Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him.
— public joke corpus
Activate your own virus... type "WIN" at the prompt.
— public joke corpus
The song, "Yankee Doodle" was originally sung by British soldiers to insult the colonialists (which was typical of the British in those days). The Continental Army took to singing it to annoy the British (which was typical of the colonialists).
— public joke corpus
A man was driving down an Alaskan road and his car broke down. He phoned the Alaskan Mobile Fixit Service and they arrived shortly after. He service man opened the bonnet and after a while the repair man said " It looks like you've blown a seal ", the man replies "No, it's just frost on my moustache."
— public joke corpus
Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two-tired.
— public joke corpus
Q: Where can you find a dog with no legs?A:Right where you left it.
— public joke corpus
What has four legs and ticks? A walking clock!
— public joke corpus
Q: How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
— public joke corpus
if stealing kids is kidnapping,is stealing adults oldnapping?
— public joke corpus
Lawyers creed: A man is innocent until proven broke.
— public joke corpus
Which fish is the most valuable in the sea? A goldfish.
— public joke corpus