Why did the elephant call the locksmith? Because he lost his keys in his trunk!
— public joke corpus
Every joke I've kept
Surf instead →allmisc 970one-liners 644classic 417general 345animal 309puns 270children 220light-bulbs 191knock-knock 91at-work 63medical 61programming 59sports 49bar 45tech 42college 28blonde-jokes 23men 19family-parents 18computers 15women 15heaven-and-hell 11crazy-jokes 9business 8deep-thoughts 8military 8holidays 7science 7one-liner 6police-jokes 6money 5school 4bar-jokes 3food-jokes 3idiots 3ocean 3blind-jokes 2dad 2ethnic-jokes 2farmers 2math 2music 2office-jokes 2old-age 2state-jokes 1
If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
— public joke corpus
Where do the monsters go when they lose a hand? To the second-hand shop.
— public joke corpus
Can you decipher this phrase? ED CROWD Over crowded: [CROWD over ED].
— public joke corpus
Did you hear that the police have a warrant out on a midget psychic ripping people off? It reads "Small medium at large."
— public joke corpus
Why did the banana go to the doctors? Because it wasn't peeling well
— public joke corpus
What did Margie say about her brain surgeon? "I really gave him a piece of my mind!"
— public joke corpus
To understand what recursion is... You must first understand what recursion is
— public joke corpus
When a dad drives past a graveyard: Did you know that's a popular cemetery? Yep, people are just dying to get in there
— public joke corpus
Q: Why are married women heavier than single women?A: Single women come home, see whats in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see whats in bed and go to the fridge.
— public joke corpus
Bad at golf? Join the club.
— public joke corpus
Sadly I will never be able to join a nudist colony..=[ My mother always told me not to point!! =]
— public joke corpus
Who is the patron saint of playgrounds? St. Francis of a see-saw!
— public joke corpus
Attorney to witness: "And where was the location of the accident?" Witness: "Approximately milepost 499." Attorney: "And where is milepost 499?" Witness: "About halfway between milepost 498 and milepost 500."
— public joke corpus
Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing.
— public joke corpus
Mothers of teens know why animals eat their young.
— public joke corpus
Why can't a gypsy man walk right? Because he has crystal balls!
— public joke corpus
Some Wocka jokes have been picked by the system as the "joke of the day". However, how can you know which day the joke was picked? Searching does not work, and it will be very tiring to browse page after page. Look at its comments and see in which day it received lots of comments!
— public joke corpus
A preacher goes into a bar and says "Anybody who wants to go to heaven, stand up." Everybody stands up except for a drunk in the corner. The preacher says "My son, don't you want to go to heaven when you die?" The drunk says "When I die? Sure. I thought you were taking a load up now."
— public joke corpus
In winter, why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
— public joke corpus