A termite walks into a bar and asks, "Is the bartender here?"
— public joke corpus
Tagged “animal”
Surf instead →allmisc 970one-liners 644classic 417general 345animal 309puns 270children 220light-bulbs 191knock-knock 91at-work 63medical 61programming 59sports 49bar 45tech 42college 28blonde-jokes 23men 19family-parents 18computers 15women 15heaven-and-hell 11crazy-jokes 9business 8deep-thoughts 8military 8holidays 7science 7one-liner 6police-jokes 6money 5school 4bar-jokes 3food-jokes 3idiots 3ocean 3blind-jokes 2dad 2ethnic-jokes 2farmers 2math 2music 2office-jokes 2old-age 2state-jokes 1
How can you tell an elephant from an ant? An ant is easier to pick up!
— public joke corpus
Q: What do you call a cat with a machine gun?A: Sir.Q: What does a snail do on a tortoise's back?A: "Vrooom... vrooom... vrooooooom..."Q: How do you know if there is an elephant under the bed?A: Your nose is touching the ceiling.
— public joke corpus
Can you decipher this phrase? SMOKE G Go up in smoke!
— public joke corpus
Can You Decipher This Phrase? QQQQQQ No excuse. There is no X listed, but there are some Qs.
— public joke corpus
What is black and red? An ape going down a hill!
— public joke corpus
Paddy tells Mick he's thinking of buying a Labrador dog. "Oh, I wouldn't if I were you!", says Mick. "Have you seen how many of their owners go blind?"
— public joke corpus
Q. What animal talks the most? A. The yak.
— public joke corpus
Two friends were out shooting birds. A bird flew from behind a tree and quick as a flash one man shot it. It uttered a squawk, folded its wings and fell to the ground. The other man turned to him and said: " You didn't need to shoot that bird. The fall would have killed it."
— public joke corpus
What is a cat's favourite exercise? Puss-Ups!
— public joke corpus
Q. What are the two main political parties in Canada? A. Moose and Squirrel
— public joke corpus
Why do ducks have webbed feet? To stamp out fires. Why do elephants have flat feet? To stamp out burning ducks.
— public joke corpus
What is represented by this? DO WN Broken down!
— public joke corpus
Can you decipher this phrase? EHCA Backache!
— public joke corpus
Why does a dog have fur? 'Cause if he didn't he'd be a little "bare"!
— public joke corpus
If a fly can fly, can an elephant elephant?
— public joke corpus
Can you decipher this phrase? RU[color=red]E[/color] Are you ready: [R U + red E].
— public joke corpus
Q. Where does a fish like to sleep? A. In a river bed!
— public joke corpus
A dog walks into an employment agency and says "I'd like to get a job please.". The guy at the employment agency says "Wow, you could easily get a job at the circus with your talents." The dog replys "What would the circus want with a plumber?"
— public joke corpus
Two cows were standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don't believe you," said Dolly. "It's true, straight up, no bull!"
— public joke corpus