They used to time me with a stopwatch... now they use a calendar.
— onelinefun.com
Tagged “sports”
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I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually, it came back to me.
— onelinefun.com
Going for a walk because I want to stay healthy. Taking along a box of M&M's because let's be honest here.
— onelinefun.com
What do you call a boat full of polite football players? A good sportsman ship.
— onelinefun.com
I named my dog 6 miles so I can tell people that I walk 6 miles every single day.
— onelinefun.com
Refusing to go to the gym counts as resistance training, right?
— onelinefun.com
If procrastionation was an Olympic sport, I'd compete in it later.
— onelinefun.com
The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as a wall.
— onelinefun.com
I'm taking part in a stair climbing competition. Guess I better step up my game.
— onelinefun.com
"I ran a half marathon" sounds so much better than "I quit halfway through a marathon".
— onelinefun.com
I wear two pairs of pants when I go golfing. People always ask me why I do. I say, "I wear two pants when's I golf just in case I get a hole-in-one.
— onelinefun.com
If you can go to the gym without telling people on the Internet, you are instantly hired by the CIA.
— onelinefun.com
When I get a dog I'm going to name him five miles so I can say I walk five miles every day.
— onelinefun.com
I recently added squats to my workouts by moving the beer into the bottom shelf of the fridge.
— onelinefun.com
I got excited when my son joined the cross-country team. But then I learned they don't cross the country and are back home in a few hours.
— onelinefun.com
My Czech mate is surprisingly bad at chess.
— onelinefun.com
I am known at the gym as the "before picture."
— onelinefun.com
Why was Cinderella banned from playing sports? Because she always ran away from the ball.
— onelinefun.com
My tennis opponent was not happy with my serve. He kept returning it.
— onelinefun.com
Want to get noticed? Go jogging without moving your arms.
— onelinefun.com