Tagged “women”

Similiarity between a woman and a computer!Both can accept a 3.5 inch floppy

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Q. What smells fishy and ends with untA. Rex Hunt

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Q:What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?A:A quater-pounder with cheese.

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A woman was in the kitchen cooking dinner and she was just singing,humming and giggling all over herself. Her husband asked her why she wasso happy. She said, "I went to the doctor today and he said I have thebreasts of a twenty year old."The husband then asked, "What did he say about your fifty year old ass?""Your name didn't come up in our conversation." She replied.

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A wealthy man came home from a gambling trip and told his wife that he had lost their entire fortune and that they'd have to drastically alter their life-style."If you'll just learn to cook," he said, "we can fire the chef.""Okay," she said. "And if you learn how to make love, we can fire the gardener."

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A doctor and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast."You aren't so good in bed either!" he shouted and stormed off to work.By midmorning, he decided he'd better make amends and phoned home. After many rings, his wife picked up the phone."What took you so long to answer?""I was in bed.""What were you doing in bed this late?""Getting a second opinion."

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Q: Why are married women heavier than single women?A: Single women come home, see whats in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see whats in bed and go to the fridge.

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wife says my husband gave me a mood ring. when i am good it turns green when i am bad he has a red mark on his forehead.

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"The car won't start," aid a wife to her husband. "I think there's water in the carburettor.""How do you know?" said the husband scornfully. "You don't even know what the carburettor is.""I'm telling you," repeated the wife, "I'm sure there's water in the carburettor.""We'll see," mocked the husband. "Let me check it out. Where's the car?""In the swimming pool."

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Whats the difference between a womans paycheck and her periods?Well...:They come once a month,They get her stressed,And if one don't come...SHES IN TROUBLE.

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Q: What is in between an 80-year-old woman's breastA: Her belly-button

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A man comes home from work and finds his wife admiring her breasts in the mirror. He asks, "What are you doing?"She replies, "I went to the doctor today, and he told me I have the breasts of a 25 year old."The husband retorts, "Well, what did he say about your 50 year old ass?"She replied, "Frankly dear, your name never came up."

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what's hairy on the out side and wet and slimey on the inside it begins whith an c and ends in a t?? a cocanut

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what did the 1 tampon say to the next tampon?? see you next peirod

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What do you call a lesbian asian? minjeeta

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